On the drive back home I tried to focus on the decisions I had to make when I got home. I left after a fight with the boy and went to Disney without him.
While I was gone I didn't miss him. After 3 weeks of constant fighting the person I thought I fell in love with was gone so not seeing or speaking to him didn't seen like much since I essentially hadn't seen him for 3 weeks. I'm not sure if that makes sense but I didn't know how to miss him and didn't know how it was supposed to feel like.
I'm do not think I will be able to get over what he has done. What if he is my happy ever after? What if he isn't? I used to think I was so sure. Is the fact that I am not anymore a sign? Are you always sure about the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Was I just wrapped in the way he spoke, the things he said; the things I had wanted my ex to say for two years?
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About Me
- allison ames
- I am broken. I wasn't born that way. I wasn't born broken. Somehow along the way I broke, over and over again I broke. It's hard to fix something that's been broken so many times. I've tried to fix me, so have others. But I've made mistakes, I've broken me too and now I don't know whether I deserve to be fixed. I wake up every morning and try to mend broken me.
there is a point when you stop being sure of the person but everything should eventually fall into place. the only reason i think he is your happily ever after is because at one point he was making you happier than you had ever been.. try and remember that feeling and see if it helps :)
ReplyDeletelove you~
Maybe he was because he made me forget everything else, not because he was making me happy but because nothing else was making me sad?
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